josh's weirdness

weirdness

my head is pounding so hard now. so all im gonna do is paste a conversation i had that made me fall out of my chair. i really did. and it didnt contribute to getting rid of my headache. most of my friends probably could guess this guy. so. whatever. read.

hey stefi
never heard from ya.. been busy i assume?

a lil

ok
what ya doing now?

nothing much

ok
got your hp back i see

uhhuh

yea
hmm
you seem pretty conservative when talking to me
is there something... like you feel about me?

what? [- this was where i fell off my chair. i cant believe that after HOW MANY YEARS, he can still be so, indignant (my headache is messing up my vocabulary cells) and do THAT all the time. when i always ALWAYS tell him, no, no and no.]

you seem pretty conservative when talking to me
thats what i said

last line?

oh
like hmm
i meant
is there something in me which bothers you?

no. [i just have a blooming headache and i dont feel like talking godamnit]

ok
sorry if i was such an asshole to you in the past.. will you forgive me?
hmm steph?
you there?
you must've rolled your eyes when i said that [strrrrrrike one]

not really

ive been hurt by alot of people
even right now
i treat people well
ah fuck
screw it
anyways
i wanted to share with you someting?

yeah?

you know once we were kinda close
used to sms everyday?
around december a few years back
i think after we met?
remembeR?

yeah. what [one the side, we werent close. just because i replied his sms's did not make him close. and i have told him TIME AND TIME AGAIN. that we had nothing in the first place. we did go out. once. and i was bored throughout. was nice, and chatted a little. but i got so fed up with the insecure "im so ugly, you shouldnt be seen with me" attitude. but today, i was too tired to start firing at him]

well
you told me about one time when you found some guys nice or something at church
right?
and i got pissed and things between us ran downhill from then
remember?

uhh
i think so

yeah
the reason why i got pissed was...
cause i actually had a crush on you

i know. [nothing new. i did say "you like me right." but he violently and angrily objected and said that iw as crazy for even thinking so. gee! without him telling me, i SWEAR, i would have never guessed]
how did u know

you told me before

oh i did?
hmm
guess you puked alot when i told you
right? [strrrrike two]

gee, no. [honest to god, i didnt.]

what did you think about it?
cause i think
you wouldnt want me right? [strrrike three. he's out.]

you're doing it again [he's always doing that, "you dont want me cuz im so ugly" shit, and the "you are so superficial.", "you're so smart, im not good enough for you".]

yikes
sorry
but its true


[i have bitched about this many many times. and the only reason why im not blowing up today, is that my headache is making me extremely sedated. even if a cockroach landed on my leg, i would just flick it off casually, and continue typing. AND thats not what i would usually do. see. reason why i DONT want to date someone like him. is because of how insecure and annoyingly "i bet you'd rather fuck a dog than to be with a loser like me right." attitude]
---------------------------------------

today was spent studying and blowing soongfee, well her eye at least, and finding block 56 with her. mass comm interview.

i found something online that makes me mad and utterly jealous for some weird reason. i HATE HATE HATE the pindick.

head's gonna pop right open. shall take my leave. ta.