unfairness

mom hates it and scolds me when i wear inappropriate stuff to school, or when i go out. i.e. my favourite brown skirt (my only brown skirt really)with nice lace at the top. i thought she'd be happy when i bought it, cuz, it had lace, meaning, it was more feminine. GOD. is she pushing me to go back to the days when all i wore wear t shirts and pants? THEY complained. and right now, when im buying nice girly stuff, they scold me. mom thinks it's trashy, and asked why i wanted to go out looking like a tramp. it's not that short, considering how short skirts can really be today. it's just, short enough. she doesnt like it because the material is too thin, and when you hold it up against a light source, you can see your hand hand on the other side. she believes that i shouldnt dress up nicely to go to school. cuz its just school. when SHE dresses up in all sorts of nice clothes and make up when she fetches my sisters to school/tuition/training, or when she picks dad up from the station. i dont know why she does that really. if i was staying in the car, and merely driving to somewhere nearby to fetch/pick people up, i wouldnt bother dressing the way she did. today i thought she was going to some dinner function, and she was like 'no. im just going to fetch your father.'

thing is, dressing up a little nicer, compared with t-shirts and jeans, which i think she deems appropriate (and horror of horrors, even, dressing up, for me at least, her teenage daughter) makes you feel better about yourself. you walk through the canteens, swarming with identical lian-ny lians with long rebonded blonde/brown hair in t-shirts and jeans, and you feel good about yourself. you strut amongst them feeling outstanding, more confident of yourself and checked out at. so, school isnt a place for fashion shows. but when you're feeling good about yourself, dont you concentrate better in lectures? i do at least. its somewhat like when you wear you're favourite underwear, maybe some nice striped thing. no one sees it, its hidden under all your clothes, and yet you walk with this spring in your step. compared to if you're wearing some stale old granny's drawers undies.

she got me this halter. this black one. and refused to let me wear it out. i have absolutely nothing more to say about that.

valentines sucked. the only good thing though, was soongfee, my sweet cakes valentines date, coming over without prior notice to hand me my rose, pot pourri and vday piece of paper. HAH. and of course, catch up. without my handphone and freedom, it's tough to update my truckloads of friends often. heh.