one word.

wow.

14 straight short hours with kz.

14 hours isnt enough!

insufficient! bu gou! tak cukop!

so much to say. so much to listen. so much to know. he intrigues me. dont know why i see him exactly the way he sees me. okay, so i do know why. but well, he's like this beautiful portrait which i cant stop gazing at. note word usage, gaze, not stare. there's so much to know about him. so much information and so much character, all inside his head. while here i am waiting for them to just flow out, and i just lap it all up.. okay, shit, sounds gross.. but yeah, there's nothing like chilling on a comfy bed, cold aircon, thermal blankets and just listening to his voice, what he has to share with me. during thosesessions, i totaly become a different person. quiet. deep in thought.. happy. not that i dont think usually. i do.. gee, that sounded bimbotic.. just that, i shut my mouth and listen to that smooth yummilicious voice of his sharing his inner thoughts about everything with me. two things, mind body and soul.. oh wait, three.. haha..

got there at 10.. cab fare.. one word. wow. bungalow at bukit timah.. bungalow.. wow.. bukit timah.. bungalow.. hur.. nicely done up house.. kinda reminds me of mine.. heh.. if mine looks like a museum as people say, his is plain stunning.. nicer than mine.. my mom would absolutely love it.. his dogs.. really sedated.. cute, but their smell could kill a minotaur ten pacings away.. dog fucker.. hahaha..

nice bedroom.. typical guys bedroom.. looks neat but the drawer's are totally in a mess.. familiar tif? eh, i suddenly smell him. he smelt good.. my shirt has it. 'onceasaintalwaysasaintonceasaintalwaysasaintonceasaintalwaysasaint' chants like seann.. took a nap.. really shagged.. 4 hours sleep.. how to live.. i've been deprieved of sufficient sleep for so long.. slept for exactly 15 minutes.. and had a dream of orchard road.. very sweet blissful sleep.. nice.. after waking, wow.. sugar coated tongue as i presumed.. so comfortable for 2 hours.. lunch was spaghetti, olive oil, very scumptious tomato bolognaise sauce, (tomatoes are an aphrodite?), other stuffs.. but i dont know my food ingredients well.. eat whatever comes along.. sausages.. mm.. which the dog ate.. i wanted the rest! sob. got to eat other stuff too, so that made up for my temporary loss.. haha.. gee, i smell him again.. could just fall asleep. played ps2.. which i lost.. he was giving me chances but i didnt want them.. got slaughtered in the end.. heh.. he kept distracting me when i was about to win!! everytime.. it was like, gasps, heart accelerating, and then, oh damn! i lost.. hur.. and no, poking me in the knee does give me an orgasm.. haha.. eh, watched the clouds and sun setting on his roof.. which was very nice.. just lying on the roof.. watching the clouds go by.. like there was nobody else on this earth but him and i.. crocodiles, giants hand with a fireball.. lotsa stuff.. recalled the times in melb, where i used to lie on the lawn and spot clouds worth imagining over.. its nice to have someone next to you while you do something you loved as a kid, and still love now.. espcially if that someone is someone special.. very special.. are you smiling now? its honestly the simple things in life which are the most enjoyable.. not the big, extravagant things that people nowadays mistake as their interpretation as heaven.. not big nice cars, nor meals at expensive restaurants, nor all paid for shopping sprees.. though they're nice, i wouldnt mind them, but they're not the greatest.. nice cars can break down, plus its just a piece of metal.. expensive restaurants can be sucky if its the wrong company.. shopping sprees can suck if you look terrible in whatever you bought.. the thing is, doing the smallest, though not unimportant,simplest, everyday things with that someone, is just awesome.. looking at the sky. talking about cumulonimbus clouds. arguing over high yielding variety seeds. watching television. documentaries. ah, now that was just great.. so comfortable.. so peaceful.. i've memorized everything already.. fell asleep while he slept too.. going grocery shopping for our dinner.. honey glazed chicken, whole meal bread.. i love grocery shopping.. just sitting next to each other.. and i reach enlightenment.. watching pathetic lame chinese-mocking movies on his computer.. laughing my ass off.. feelings, they are too soon, but the person, he's the one. hope im not frekaing him out by saying that.. ever felt that ever-so-sure feeling in our life? i've never felt that, but i am now.. thinking how to tell my parents about him. if they meet and acknowledge him, things would be so much easier.. wont have to lie to them about who im going out with, or using tif's and sean's names all the time..

his beautiful smile... he IS beautiful.. i wonder why, so much, he's got a great character, a seriously great character, and is beautiful on the ouside too, yet he was unclaimed property.. i dunno.. but one thing, i know this for sure, im so God-thankful thankful that i've met him, thru his act of desperation, and now. i have him. mine.

oh. and that aerosmith song. thats for you.