im another ex-girlfriend on your list
but I should have thought of that before we kissed

I kinda always knew I'd end up your ex-girlfriend
I hope I hold a special place with the rest of them
And you know it makes me sick to be on that list
But I should have thought of that before we kissed

You say you're gonna burn before you mellow
I will be the one to burn you
Why'd you have to go and pick me?
When you knew that we were different, completely

I'm about to give you away for someone else to take

We keep repeating mistakes for souvenirs
And we've been in between the days for years
And I know that when I see you I'm going to die
I know I'm going to want you and you know why
It's going to kill me to see you with the next girl
'Cause I'm the most gorgeously jealous kind of ex-girl

But I should have thought of that before we kissed...

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hint: not about jon.. guess who? actually the word which attracted my attention was the word kiss.. haha.. so true! i mean if i knew, which i did, that we wouldnt last, why did i still go through all those stuff with him? when it would just make the final ending worse and harder to deal with.. now im definitely dealing hard with it.. yes im over him.. but there's still a little part which misses him.. his messages. his calls where he just wants to tell me he misses me.. his kisses.. his shoulder my head leans on.. the smell around him.. his fingers twined around mine.. his arms around me.. just feel so comfortable, safe and secure.. -sob- ok it just hit me.. infatuation, no? hmm.. that's probably why i dont like skinny guys, or guys any smaller than me.. haha..

was at soongfee's chior concert just now.. very nice.. much nicer than presbies.. hmm.. met samantha, soong, nathaniel (a nice one), phyllis.. sat with nat.. he's quite nice i guess.. yeah.. looks like gikian! haha.. but.. as i sat there.. in the dark.. a weird feeling crept over me.. the this position and atmosphere reminds me of him feeling.. something like homesickness. found myself wishing for him, there with me.. to be comforted once again.. but then, when will it end? shouldnt pro-long the pain.. ok.. after that..went for supper with soong and nat.. super broke.. paid with coins! haha.. newton.. not as crowded..

guys who think im aggressive are pussies! my mousey is a weak pussy! hah! thanks melody..

thank you God.. i learn new things with every failure.. not to be too demanding (first), not to be too irritiating and clingy for too long (jon), not to get carried away too much (him), everything just screws it up.. think she has a good reason for not letting her boyfriend for over a year kiss her on the lips.. way to go!

jon..valerie..jon.. valerie.. why.. they wont last.. so what? does it have to do with me? he is nothing to me.. JERK! i find myself thinking of what he sees in her that i dont have. bitchiness? maturity? does he talk to her stuff he talks to me? do they sweet talk or doe he turn on his sarcastic self.. sweet talk.. don juan.. that dream of mine.. why doesnt it come true.. i;ve waited so long.. why am i thinking of him coming back.. it wont happen.. hes not good enough.. really.. but i would accept him, no? would i? when the time comes.. he will come back.. just up to me if i would take him back.. he's not good enough for me, but he's the perfect one.. WHY?